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Women Who Think Too Much by Susan Nolen-Hoeksema
Date: Nov 11, 2021
Do you ever begin reading a book for its title? I ran across the title “WOMEN WHO THINK TOO MUCH” and immediately knew that this book would be worth reading! It was the right choice and even though I read it a while ago, I still think about it almost every day!!!
Susan Nolen-Hoeksema was a psychologist and writer whose work helped to explain why many people, especially women, spend countless hours thinking about negative ideas, feelings and experiences. She called this “OVERTHINKING”! …and it’s exactly what it means – thinking too much…You start ruminating about the past, blaming yourself for things you didn’t do and worrying about the future. While it’s human nature to think things through, it can be a real problem…
We all experience stress and anxiety at some point but if we constantly worry about almost everything in our lives, we end up spiralling in a negative thought cycle. The detail in which Susan talks about overthinking is very insightful. She explains what causes people to overthink and gives lots of useful tips on how we can train ourselves to overcome these destructive thought patterns. The book provides many real-life scenarios, psychological studies and research examples that are easy to refer to.
I must admit that I have never really talked with anyone about my endless thoughts, thinking that it’s just the way I am. My first impression was that this book was about me! It made me think that I’m not alone in this. Thinking about all the things I could have done differently has always been an issue for me. Of course, we all overthink sometimes but I hadn’t realised that it was taking so much of my time and energy until I read this book. The message of the book resonated with me far more than I had anticipated. It made me understand that ruminating does not help the problem get solved. I wish I had read this years ago!!!
The book offers strategies for moving forward and breaking the overthinking habits. I’ve learned how to adjust my focus, so that I have a more realistic outlook on my situation. It’s important to let go of your past because it can’t be changed – what’s done is done… The author recommends finding a distraction by getting involved in an activity that you enjoy. Things like running, gardening, painting, model construction or even playing with your pets can be great distractions. Setting aside some time for thinking later might also help… So, trick your brain and don’t let the thoughts win!
No matter at which stage of life we are, it’s never too late to shape our choices! I benefitted a lot from this book, and I was totally engaged in reading it from the very first couple of pages – that’s how interesting it was! I’ll be recommending “WOMEN WHO THINK TOO MUCH” to everybody because it changed the way I look at the world. It’s worth the money and the reading!